Susan Reisler Litwin
Journaling, Meditation, and Wonderings
Ahhhhh, it’s so relaxing. I’m sitting outside on a cozy chair. I have my journal resting on my lap. I’m writing about yesterday. I’m gazing outwards, thinking, dreaming, asking myself to remember. How did I feel then? Who was I with? What was happening? When did this take place? Where am I in my life? Why is this? I ask myself so many questions and then I write something down.
I will write about anything. Politics, Entertainment, Climate, Pop Culture, Friendships, Family, Love, Distain, Crime, Glory, Sports, Passions, Design, Music, Medicine, Science, anything which is important to me at that moment.
It’s all about the moments.
The moments with me and about me. It’s my time to be within my mind and record some of that time.
Years ago, my dear friend told me I should do yoga. She said I would love the spiritual journey and exercise. At that time, I didn’t have the need to go on a spiritual journey. Every time I wrote into my journal, I was on my own personal spiritual journey. Daily I write and meditated with myself and my thoughts. I also record it.
Sometimes, I can sit for an hour and only write 1 page. What am I doing which takes so long? It shouldn’t take me more than 20 minutes to write 1 page. Why does it take me so long? Truthfully, I get lost in the words, the thoughts, and the time. I enter a place in my mind and become detached from reality.
My journaling is meditative. My journaling is mindful.
All my emotions, secrets, and deepest thoughts and passions are expressed in my journals. All the times I wanted to get my furious anger out, I wrote it down. All the times I wanted to tell that piece of sh*t person how I really felt about them, I wrote it down. All the times I wanted to scream and cry and tear the world apart, I wrote it down. All the times I cheered from unbridled joy, I wrote it down.
I wrote my heart out on paper. If my journal wasn’t enough, I climbed to the top of a mountain and screamed my lungs out! Then… I wrote that down, too!
Although I do most of my journaling at home, my favourite place to write is on an airplane. The longer the flight, the more I write. When I’m flying, there is so little to distract me. I am stuck for hours and my thoughts are able to be heard, so I write.
Many people ask me if I write in my journal daily. I try to, but I don’t always have the opportunity. When I miss days, I catch up when I have the time. If I forget what happened, I just write about other things. There is always something to write about.
My journals are not daily event keepers. I usually don’t write about what I did each day. I write what I’m thinking about, what the world is about, what is affecting me, what I dream about, want, need, love, hate, like, yearn, wish, eat, breath and be.
Some pages have titles, such as SNUBS or DIRT or FRUSTRATION or JOY or ACCOMPLISHMENT or HEALTH or ICE CREAM or LOVERS!
On occasion I will write, “I have nothing to say. Nothing. I’m empty. I’m closed. DONE.” Other days, I can write 5 pages and just ramble on and on and on and on and on and… There is no order to this passion of writing in a journal.
I started writing in a journal when I was 14 and I haven’t stopped at 57. I am currently writing in journal #94. I need to mention that my journals are ‘considered private’, but people do read them. Most people don’t want to read them for fear of reading something they don’t want to know. Truthfully speaking, my journals are VERY BORING! They do not read like a story. There is no beginning, middle, or end. There is nothing really interesting except for the defining moments in my life, like: when I got married, gave birth to my children, my sweet 16 party, got my teaching license, graduated, and anyone else’s big events in their lives which I might have participated in. Yes, my journals are the history books of my family and friends!
Actually, the occasional crazy emotional rant is fun to re-read. My language is very colourful and disgusting! I can go on for pages screaming my thoughts and swearing and cursing the most horrible dirty down to the core of the earth vulgarities any person can think of. Yes! I have the capacity to be that offensively gross! Those pages are fun to re-read with a glass of wine. I can even make myself laugh when I read an old rant.
So the point is… I encourage you to start writing in a journal. You can buy lined journals in any dollar store. It’s not a big investment. Give your journal a title, date it, and write about you on the first day. Your name, age, address, phone number, wishes, wants, desires, dreams, feelings, friends, and family. On the next day write about the world. What is your world as far as sports, music, politics, entertainment, science, climate, and the future. On the next day write about your deeper feelings, your loves, hates, anger, joy, needs, passions, and heart.
On the next day, sit in a quite space and let your mind wonder, ponder, gaze, and think. Write about your wonderings and let yourself drift into your thoughts. If you snapped out and snapped back in, you meditated while journaling. Bravo, you found some peace of mind.
I hope you will try this at least once in your life. If you complete your journal, then you have created a personal history book! If you have not completed your journal, at least, you tried and good job for trying!
Or maybe start your journal with a disgusting fowl mouthed rant! That’s inspiring! Go for it baby!!! Today… I started this Stupid, Horrible, F#!/?K, Annoying Journal and I just want to let everyone know how I feel about this so-called mindful crap! Ode to the power of words!